Excite Truck review-me-do.

There are often times in my life when I get somewhat jaded, and just don't want to play games. At least, none of the ones I have, at any rate. This leads to me constantly having unfinished games, and me constantly being in the middle of more games than there are hours in the day. For example, right now I am technically still playing Megaman 9. And Okami. CoD 4, GTA IV, Super Paper Mario, Mario Galaxy, Prey, Uncharted, Resistance, and it goes back even further. Shadow of the Colossus, for fucks sake! Why did I never complete that one? (Hint : It got dull.)

At times like this the last thing I should do is try something else. And yet, invariably, I feel the need for a new experience. When my latest title arrived from lovefilm, it was something I wasn't really bothered about ever playing. I had avoided it plenty of times, but I figured "Why not? How bad can it be?"

I shouldn't have doubted the quality. I know full well that the solution to Jaded Gamer Syndrome is to play something old-school. Something with zero story, PROPER VIDEOGAME PHYSICS (ie. no physics at all), and gloriously uncomplicated aims. You know, the kind of thing where you never worry about where to go next, or find the exact bit of scenery to interact with for the next cut-scene. Nope, just a straightforward twitch game.

Excite Truck suffices. It does more than suffice, actually. It lives up to its name. It excites, it truly does.

The speed of the game can only be described as blazing. Sure, these are not exactly Motorstorm quality graphics, but they are still nice enough. Better than anything you played until a couple of years ago, certainly. Backgrounds whizz past, trees come at you so suddenly you can't avoid them, and enemy cars all look like they are racing the same course as you are. It's all fantastic, unless you are one of those fuckheads on the internet who insist that everything needs to be full 1080p and that you CAN ACTUALLY TELL THE DIFFERENCE. (Hint : You can't.)

So, you narrowly avoid the trees, smash the hell out of the truck in front of you, and then you go up a hill. Flick your Wiimote up, hit the d-pad for a turbo, and see a whole new level of JOY. Flying through the air, sometimes at insane heights, tilt your Wiimote just right so you land all 4 wheels at the same time, and get another boost. This can usually take you right to the next jump, wherein you get to boost again. Or maybe it takes you to a ! icon, which allows COOL STUFF to happen. Like the entire terrain might deform to make a new jump for you to OMG WEEEEEEEEE up once more. There are tracks where you just don't get the time to drive any kind of planned route, you are simply reacting to the near-permanent boost. You will smile, you will laugh, and you may well even squeal.

Of course, being a Wii title, there are issues. Tantamount is the steering. See, you control it with the Wiimote on it's side. Not a porblem, except that none of us are as steady as we think we are, and the Wiimote is sometimes too bloody sensitive. So you often find yourself having to correct for movements you didn't even realise you made. Or, worse still, you find yourself unable to steer the way you wanted to because you moved the damn Wiimote, or tilted it differently. Thing is, it is always your own fault, so it's not a valid complaint. But it will make you shout. Waggle is used sparingly, and I was pleasantly surprised to find myself hammering the 2 button when I crashed instead of the usual mid-air Wiimote wank motion.

Blah blah blah, race mode and challenge mode, blah blah blah, 2 player option, blah blah blah, rising difficulty levels, blah blah blah, unlock tracks and trucks, blah blah blah. All the requisite boxes ticked. Custom soundtracks via SD card are a nice addition, something that should relly have become standard in all games since the days of the original XBastard. Being an early Wii game there is no online at all, which is a pity. 4 player would also be nice, but I can imagine 4 players having fun taking turns and watching others. It's just got that old feel to it.

The biggest fault I can find with Excite Truck is that it makes me REALLY want an online F-Zero. Which probably says more for the speed of it than anything else, and also probably marks me out as so big a nerd that I shouldn't be allowed out of doors any more.

So far I have completed Bronze and Silver cups, as well as a couple of the challenges. I prefer the challenges, as they are the exact kind of thing that I do best. OCD gaming, where you do what you did last time but faster, sooner, harder, better, chasing that boner-inducing S rank. But, that's enough to tell me that this is one excellent game. Also enough to tell me it may well be a little short.

'Outdated concept that has no real use' out of ten. My life has been improved having played it, and if I ever see it cheap enough I may well buy it. Definite rental for anyone else, it's just so much fun.